More Words

I've had quite a few conversations over the past few days.  Some of them are like chocolate on my tongue.  Sweet...  leaving me wanting more.  A shared language, an appreciation for expression of our journey.  Tonight, I listened to a politician.  One, let's say, I never voted for.  He was more than the lesser of two evils.  Every sentence was prefaced with, "As I'm sure you're aware," "I know you realize," "You must know...", "And surely you can recognize," "I don't need to tell you what this means,"....  I'm surprised he fit through the meeting door with such a large head! I literally wanted to shower after being subjected to listening to him for an hour.  I wanted to scream, "Guess what?  I DO KNOW AND I DON'T THINK THAT!"  I don't normally get rattled where politics are concerned.  I can appreciate how one came to their belief system and in most instances, see how it serves them.  I guess being up close and personal like that tonight, not by choice, just was more than a taste.  I much prefer my chocolate conversation.  Which I hope to have many more...  I have so many little things I remember that help keep my focused....keep my perspective positive...keep me grounded so I can be.  I don't want to re-act... I think when we re-act we are simply going on off old, often unhealthy patterns.  So my little voice kicks in...  I can say... hmmm.. what if?  What if everything I thought isn't really so?  What if I decide I'm okay?  That phrase replays quite a bit for me lately.  No matter what insanity someone else chooses to engage in...I'm okay!  They're two simple words that my nine year old daughter's counselor repeats often. I get so much out of her sessions as I sit and listen...  I'm reminded of the Seinfeld episode where George decides to do the opposite of what he would normally do...  too funny.  I don't know if its the opposite, but surely I am challenging myself to be open to the what ifs.   I like that.  The unknown isn't scary.  Because I'm strong.  I've been through hell and I'm not stopping here.  Please, move out of the way.  Yes, powerful words.  I could have fully engaged in a very powerful conversation with that politician if I weren't "on duty"...  geez, small towns are no fun sometimes.  But, perhaps if it just fits the category of entertainment I can tolerate the next meeting.  Funny, how people think throwing money around means something.  I know exactly what they're searching for...  my chocolate conversation.  Words that do envelope you in a soft blanket, keep you warm, and build a relationship.